The Reason I Will Sing My Love Songs Louder

OMG. This morning, I saw the following letter posted in the elevator of my apartment complex and I had to write it down. Finally somebody said it! HA!!!!

Dear Neighbors,

We know it’s tough to be in a mature adult relationship, however we don’t want to hear your problems.

Here are a few suggestion:

A.  Shut your door when you decide to kill each other. It’s only courteous.

B.  Learn how to whisper. It’s really quite easy!

C.  Break Up. He’s no good for you and from the sounds of it, you’re a psycho.

D. Move. (The preferred option, for everyone)

Regardless of how you choose to solve this problem, please keep your skeletons in the closet. We don’t need the details or particularly enjoy hearing you fight from 7pm till midnight.

Yours truly,

Your Neighbors, Including Every Boat in The Marina

P.S. At times, we can hear every. . . single. . . word. . . truly embarrassing.